Blame vs Responsibility

slight edge graph

Probably the best book I have read in the last 15 years (and I’ve read thousands) is Jeff Olsen’s “Slight Edge.”

This book will be THE most Gifted book in my lifetime.  Meaning, I will give this book to friends and family and graduates etc.

I devoured this book in about 2 days my first time through.  It’s such a simple concept the entire book can be summed up in about a page, heck, summed up with a single picture!   

Utterly Simplistic in design, Jeff goes on throughout the book with multiple real life examples that make his BIG IDEA stick.

I am now on my second time through the book. This time I read a page or two at a time.  Sometimes it’s just a paragraph.

I am wanting to just “get” one concept at a time, and just let it sink in.

Today, it was a single sentence.

Allow me to share.

Basically he recalls research over decades, looking into where people feel like they are in their life.  Measured in terms of  “successful or unsuccessful.” Yep, it all boils down to two words, which just so happen to translate directly to happy or not happy.

Those that consider themselves successful repeatedly used the word RESPONSIBLE as they described how they got to where they were. 

As opposed to those that unsuccessful and unhappy repeatedly laid BLAME on others or other events.

Two words.  Basically, a mindset.

The ENTIRETY of life was due directly to their responsibility or the fault of other people in their lives.

The concept really stuck.  I can think of at least Two people in my life that are 100% stuck in this quandary right now.  They are blaming others for their misery. They refuse to take responsibility for their spot in life.

And by two I mean about 2000.

Like I said, one sentence was enough for today.

I let that idea brew all day long.    I applied the idea while at work in my clinic.

Recall, I’m a sports based chiropractor.  People come to me for their pains and stresses.   My back hurts, I have a sore elbow etc.  But we talk.  There is a lot of psychology that happens on my clinic.   My clients talk about EVERTYTHING!  -so many aspects of life.  Health, money, relationships, sports performance.   This idea is broad spectrum and applies to everything.

Easy example from today in the clinic:

Does your bum knee really hurt because you had a crappy therapist, terrible surgeon and no rehab that worked and it will always just be your crutch to bear or is it because you never did a thing yourself to help your own recovery.    You went three times a week to rehab but never did the stuff you were told to do at home and just basically gave up?

I don’t know?  I’m just asking.    

Are you broke because you have a crappy job and your boss is an idiot and your co workers are backstabbers and keep you from getting noticed or are you in a rut and just never shop around for something better and spend your money on lattes, red bull and six packs every day?

Are you riding the bench during football games because the coach doesn’t notice you and the popular kids get the positions and the mayor’s kid gets special favors from the staff or did you not pick up a weight all summer and some stud Sophomore kid is driven and pushed himself to get better?

Look, I get it – crazy terrible stuff happens in life.  Things I can’t imagine or put myself in your shoes about.  Accidents, Disease, War, Bankruptcy..LIFE happens differently to different people.

But how do you handle it?

Some of the most successful and “making it rain” hand gesture cash making fools have gone bankrupt.

Presidents have emerged from War.

Some of the strongest Humans I’ve ever met have been in horrible accidents.

Even when it truly was someone else’s fault or a random act of Nature…

It’s how they handle what life dishes out to them that directs their next steps and consequently sets the course of their entire path.

You’ve heard of  the path called life?  Exactly. Lots of steps and decisions.

Blame is easy.

Responsibility is equally… just as easy.

It’s such a simple applicable decision to make. 

And it is THE decision that makes all the difference.  The difference in what direction you progress, your point of view and most importantly in RESULTS.

It applies to a lot…of life.

Play with this word swap…you know I love these word swap, perception changes  

(Do These Guys Look Nervous?   Your Goals Suck)

  Simple yet effective.

Or don’t do anything…you can always blame me for never having any good info on my page. 

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