Recognize the fallacy of general statements and keep your clarity, understanding your own personal truth.

This is the core of what I call the Blue Hair Fallacy.

The story, as told by a preacher or minister in an Instagram post, went like this: he approached a member of his congregation and simply said, ‘I just don’t like your blue hair.’ The person, visibly offended, reacted strongly. Yet, they didn’t have blue hair. The preacher’s point was clear: the offense shouldn’t affected this person in his congregation because it didn’t fit for them.

This person, like so many of us, reacted not to the statement itself, but to the criticism itself even when it didn’t apply.

The meaning, is know yourself.

Here’s a practical example: this morning, in the midst of the usual school-run chaos, I mentioned,

‘It seems we’re perpetually five minutes late.’ Immediately, my daughter, who had been ready and waiting, retorted, ‘Why are you blaming me? I’ve been ready for ages!’

This is the Blue Hair Fallacy in action. She knew she wasn’t the cause of our tardiness. She knew she didn’t ‘have blue hair.’ Yet, my general statement triggered a defensive response.

This phenomenon is far more prevalent than we realize. Social media, with its carefully curated algorithms, amplifies it. The job of social media is not to agree with you; it’s to get clicks. It basically runs an algorithm to say, ‘I want this to really resonate with half of the population and create a strong emotional reaction or offense to the other half.’ That’s how we get clicks and likes.

My own father, a wise and very well read man, is constantly agitated by posts on his Facebook feed. He can’t resist engaging with content that contradicts his views. It’s the Blue Hair Fallacy playing out on a digital stage. He tells me about stuff that comes across his feet on Facebook. I tell him, “Dad, I don’t care about the stuff on Facebook, especially on your FB. If it doesn’t pertain to me and it doesn’t pertain to you, it’s none of my damn business with these other people think.”

I see it in social media with other friends of mine, I have even been guilty of it. Often presented as, “i know some of you all don’t like….”

But unless you’re a celebrity, I just don’t really think that fits. Maybe one or two people mention something but that’s what trolls do. They mention stuff, try to get under your skin. Make you reconsider what you posted and really who cares.

If it doesn’t apply to you, know yourself and then let it go.

Look for it in your own life. You’ll find it everywhere. And here’s the key: recognizing it is the first step to liberation.

If something doesn’t directly pertain to you, or even if it does but lacks real consequence, simply let it go. We live in a world saturated with stress and strife. Our brains, wired to solve problems, latch onto the smallest grievances when larger threats are absent.

The brain wants to protect!

Imagine an alien invasion. Suddenly, social media debates and minor slights would fade into insignificance. Real, immediate dangers would take precedence. The mundane and smaller issues that seem to aggravate us in our life are disregarded because it isn’t an immediate threat. That’s just how we are wired. We always have something in our life that needs fixing, despite the fact that we live in probably the safest, healthiest, and best time in human history, we tend to think that these are bad times. This is us. It’s not that there’s an actual problem.

it’s almost never how things are that bothers us, It’s how we feel things should be.

My wife and I have discussed this concept for years. When life throws true hardship, petty offenses vanish.

This morning, the Blue Hair Fallacy became crystal clear. It was a concept I’d seen play out, but never fully articulated. It was like simplifying a complex idea into a three-word philosophy, something I’ve found immensely helpful in my own life.

This aligns perfectly with my approach to understanding complex ideas. I’ve been doing this subconsciously for years and now, with my website Be Awesome 365 (which, admittedly, has been a bit neglected lately, but this idea felt too important to share), I’m reminded of the power of simplifying concepts.

In fact, this approach is central to my upcoming book, “Unlocking Athletic Potential.” In athletics, this concept is crucial. When I address my entire team and say, ‘We aren’t playing defense well,’ the player who’s excelling defensively needs to understand the intent of my statement without taking it personally. They must recognize that the general statement doesn’t apply to their flawless performance, much like someone dismissing a ‘blue hair’ comment when they don’t have blue hair. This is the core of effective communication and team dynamics, and it’s a principle I explore in depth in my book.

So, start noticing the Blue Hair Fallacy in your daily interactions.

Smile to yourself, knowing you possess the ‘inside secret’ to navigate the noise. It’s a superpower—the ability to choose peace in a world determined to provoke. And perhaps, it’s a superpower we can apply to more than just our social interactions, but to how we approach learning and growth in all areas of life, including unlocking our athletic potential.

Recognize the fallacy of general statements and keep your clarity, understanding your own personal truth.